Sunday, August 31, 2014

Gembira


Ada orang menangis, bila gembira. 
Ada orang ketawa, bila gembira. 

Tapi apa sebenarnya yang buat kita gembira?

Skor 4.0 dalam exam?
Mengolok kawan yang jatuh di tandas?
Tolong makcik angkat barang sambil melintas jalan?
Makan durian Musang King sampai sendawa?

Alang call last few weeks. 
Dia sedih tak dapat buat mak abah gembira. 

So, I asked her how you define gembira?
How mak abah define gembira?

For me,
Jika balik every month tu dapat buat mak abah gembira, saya akan balik. 
Jika minta transfer tu dapat buat mak abah gembira, saya akan minta. 
Jika kahwin tu dapat buat mak abah gembira, saya akan kahwin. 

Cuma, belum rezeki saya untuk balik duduk dengan mak abah. Belum sampai jodoh saya untuk kahwin. 

Its different when it comes to her situation. 
Dia ada dekat rumah every single day. Tolong mak basuh pinggan. Tolong abah angkat baju. 
Macamana desperatenya saya nak duduk rumah! Nak buat semua benda untuk gembirakan mak abah. Jealous! 
Cari makna gembira dalam kehidupan seharian kita. 
Setiap aspek kehidupan ada terselit kegembiraan. 

Jauh dari mak abah. Allah uji dengan macam-macam. 
Hari-hari saya balik kerja tak mampu nak tolong itu ini buat mak abah gembira. 
Mak abah tak ada depan mata saya. 
Hanya mampu call bila malam nak laporkan aktiviti harian dengan mereka. 
Hari-hari, cukup untuk saya buat kawan-kawan gembira. Cukup saya buat pak guard dekat apartment tersenyum. Cukup saya buat pesakit tersenyum. 
Itu makna gembira bagi hari-hari saya. 

Dan, 
bersyukurlah setiap masa bila Allah bagi kita peluang untuk buat mak abah kita gembira. 
Sementara mereka masih ada. Sementara kita masih bernyawa. 



Lots of love,
betty


Saturday, April 19, 2014

random


Hello weekend. 

Having this little computer with me buat rasa nak menulis tu datang balik.
But this is totally random. Woke up on Saturday morning with mixed feelings. Just took few minutes after packed my bag for short trip with Nedhu. Pity her. Nak kejutkan bangun pagi ni pun tak sampai hati. Lumrah seorang junior doctor i think.

Random post. 
Random people.
Random idea.

Abah selalu pesan,
Dalam hidup kita tak akan dapat semua benda yang kita nak. We have to choose. We have to prioritize things. And kadang-kadang tak semua yang kita nak kita dapat.
People can be so beruntung, Alhamdulillah. 
Blessed with a happy family. Blessed with a good job. 
Tapi ada orang diuji Allah macam-macam. 

I'll always remind my little sister, Surah Al-Baqarah ayat 286. 
Allah tu Maha Mengetahui more than anyone. He is the creator sebab tu Dia tahu hambaNya. 
Dia tahu sejauh mana kemampuan hambaNya untuk menghadapj ujian dariNya. 
Senjata utama adalah doa. Dan setiap perancangan semua adalah daripadaNya. 

And for people who came in our life,
tak ada orang yang datang tanpa tujuan dalam hidup kita.
The one that I met on my way up to Gunung Kinabalu, we don't know each other but they taught me that life is not that easy for certain people. 
The one that I met at Pulau Sibuan, we don't know each other but they taught me that food is not cheap and they worked hard for it. 
The one that I met at hospital, we don't know each other but they taught me to appreciate everyone and everything in life as long as they are still alive. 

Definitely people will come and go. Definitely. 
Unless Allah said, he/she is the one for you and maybe you gonna spend the rest of your life till Jannah with them. InsyAllah.
But still if dah sampai ajal, semua orang pun akan pergi juga kan?

Ada masa itu bukan ceritanya. 
Ada masa orang itu datang dan pergi.
Kalau tak lama, sekejap. Kalau tak sekejap, lama. 

It depends on you how to cope with that situation. Like they said 'how to mend a broken heart'.
But don't be not so clever dengan all those suicidal ideas.

If you want to cry, go ahead. Find someone to talk and then cry. 
Jangan nangis dalam tandas sebab banyak syaitan dekat situ. So totally not a good idea.
Especially bawah shower. Someone laughed at me when I mentioned this idea. 
Get a good night sleep. 
Wake up and make a decision. 

Semua pun berbalik pada diri sendiri. Kita yang menjadikan keadaan macam ini.
Maka kita bertanggungjawab terhadap diri sendiri.
Kalau pun nak salah kan orang lain, siapa?

Ingat dalam hati. Allah sentiasa ada. Keluarga sentiasa ada. 
Berdoalah insyAllah ada penyelesaian.
Kembali pada Allah. Dia Maha Mendengar Maha Mengasihani. 
It took me two hours to decide. Days to move on.
Maybe you need more than that. Give yourself a break from all these tiny little things.
Banyak lagi major things for you to do. For you to think.

Kak Ros told me,
"Ada orang kena rasa kehilangan, baru dia belajar menghargai" 
Mungkin Allah jauhkan kita daripada seseorang, supaya kita hargai orang lain disekeliling kita. Siapa tahu kan? Kalau dah jodoh tak ke mana tu. Nanti dia datang balik, insyAllah. 
Lambat ke cepat ke kita serahkan pada Allah. 

Siapa tak peningkan bila orang asyik tanya bila nak kahwin?
Senyum. 



Lots of love,
izzati










Wednesday, January 1, 2014

Hello 2014


بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ
"Dengan menyebut nama Allah Yang Maha Pemurah lagi Maha Penyayang"

Goodbye 2013.
Full with memories. The ups and downs.
Allah itu Maha Adil bukan?

Lots of new year resolutions katanya. So, here I'm telling you my 2014 resolutions.
May Allah ease everything throughout the year, insyAllah.


#1 achieve 2012's resolutions

#2 complete my manuscript for pacemaker

#3 start my DUR for Vasteral and Elantan

#4 start the Pain Clinic Service 

#5 no more procrastination in everything

#6 spend money wisely

#7 increase discipline level

#8 follow daily schedule. don't cheat

#9 be nice to people no matter how they treat you

#10 perbaiki diri supaya cita-cita tercapai :)


10 is enough for now. 
so many events scheduled for next year.  mampu berdoa supaya Allah permudahkan semuanya.

I do have my own cita-cita. To be a pharmacist, alhamdulillah i'm a pharmacist now.
Then, we decided to have another dream. 

Tak apa, gonna turn 25 this year and still have long way to go.
But, keep calm and doa kan? Allah yang atur semuanya.



have a nice year ahead mate!


lots of love,
betty

Thursday, December 19, 2013

keep calm and stay strong

Alhamdulillah for an awesome 2013, Ya Allah. 




Blessed with a good health. Though few tests from You but still able to breath now is the greatest gift after all. 

Blessed with supportive people around me. Though some people does 't like me that much but never mind. I got You. 

Blessed with crazy housemates. Though I'm not that helpful with the house chores sometimes. Haha. 

Blessed with never-fed-up bestfriend in Penang. Though I know she is tired listening to my complaints everyday. Haha. 

Blessed with super duper loving and caring parents. Though they have to fetch and send me to the airport almost every month! No one in the world can replace you Mak & Abah :')

My never ending tasks will never stop me from seeking love from You. 

Allah is near. Allah is listening. 
Doa sebagai usaha. Dan jangan berhenti berusaha. Doa sebagai senjata orang mu'min. 

Ujian daripada Allah mesti bersebab. Setiap yang berlaku pasti bersebab. 

I just read Sebelum Aku Bernikah. Oh, gelakkan la saya sebab lapuk sudah buku itu kan? Tapi ilmu tidak pernah lapuk. Dan selepas itu baru saya faham. It is not about nikah. Its all about the knowledge of dua jiwa. The preparations. Not about preparations of the materials but of you, yourself. Whether you are ready of not? 

At this age of 24, with friends around me gave birth, waiting for the birth of their babies and preparing for their Big Day, I'm here enjoying my own sweet time travelling, working and shopping. Haha. Hilal tulis dalam buku, jodoh itu kena ada usaha. Jadi, usaha saya berdoa. When it comes to jodoh, I think doa is the best thing I always do. Not only me. Most of my friends pun did the same thing. 

And, mak & abah tak tanya pun lagi. Haha. Diam-diam dulu. Kalau ada jodoh tak ke mana kan? 

Adapting to new environment is not that easy. Sama macam tinggalkan your bad habit. Tapi Allah sentiasa ada kan nak mudahkan urusan kita? 

Sama macam bila flight delay. Mesti ada hikmah. So, kena banyak-banyak sabar dan janganlah marah MAS ke AirAsia ke Malindo tu. Dan sebabnya saya tengah tunggu flight yang dah delay 40 minit. Haha. 

I think that latte just know didn't work. I'm super duper sleepy now and can't wait to board the flight and sleep. 

Take care people. And see you soon semenanjung. 

P/s knowing you for a year is good enough for me. Thanks for the memories. 


Tuesday, November 26, 2013

happy anniversary, sayang


بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ
"Dengan menyebut nama Allah Yang Maha Pemurah lagi Maha Penyayang"

Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah.
This in an advance post for my one year anniversary in Sabah. Since I'll be in Pantai Timur this end of November, I decided to post this earlier.

saya sentiasa percaya dengan perancangan Allah. apa pun terjadi. apa pun berlaku pasti ada hikmah.
ada banyak 'kalau' jika kita nak persoalkan tapi siapa kita kan?
Allah yang Maha Besar. bukan kita bukan siapa-siapa.

terlalu banyak Sabah mengajar saya menghargai setiap saat Allah beri udara.
terlalu banyak Sabah mengajar saya erti sebenar kehidupan susah payah mencari makan.
terlalu banyak Sabah mengajar saya pahit manis kehidupan bila jauh daripada keluarga.
terlalu banyak Sabah mengajar saya siapa kawan siapa lawan.

perjalanan dalam kehidupan tak pernah berhenti selagi nyawa yang Allah beri pinjam masih ada.
sama seperti menuntut ilmu.bukan sampai negara China malah jauh lagi sekarang.

november 2012


my first waran udara

december 2012


our first trip to Keningau


alhamdulillah. managed to climb though i didn't reach the low's peak.


super duper sejuk here, try lah!


once climbed, I can't stop looking for the mount.

january 2013


trip to Klias River with colleague


my first trip back home


first time doing passive on-call.see the mess?

february 2013


Ijat & Hajar birthday celebration at Manis-Manis Resort. No phone reception at all here.


Chinese New Year 2013 celebration at Jabatan Farmasi HQE II


our trip to Bohey Dulang


little boy climb up the coconut tree at Pulau Sibuan


sunrise at Pulau Mabul

march 2013


zahirah & irman solemnization


zah & irman wedding reception


i decided to come back home flying with Malindo Air for the first time and we decided to go to Fraser's Hill

april 2013


tanjung simpang mengayau, kudat


a very special island with white beach, pantai kelambu


partner in crime dekat Sabah 

may 2013


home for the election


sukau


roof top of Nak Hotel, Sandakan


waiting for the sunset at Nak Hotel


cause I miss the fun at home then i decided to buy last minute ticket

june 2013


program transformasi minda 6/13


groupmate super duper cool and awesome


PRP life thought us something that no one can take it from us


and, you know how much i miss this time of the year?


and will always miss everyone!


best friend's engagement!

july 2013


biostatistic & research methodology workshop, pusat jantung sarawak


best friend come over to sabah!

august 2013


annual family gathering


teman bergaduh sepanjang masa


best friends! 12 years and counting.


trip to penang


the owl museum

september 2013


my third research paper but first one represent an institution


delegates from HQE II


best friend paling susah hendak jumpa


housemate's son. can't believe she is a mother now.


attending nad and am reception at kuala sungai baru with kakaks


september birthday celebration.


my first branula inserted after 23 years born.see the redness and swelling?


and, thank you Allah for the little family of friends here in Sabah


happy birthday, me!

october 2013


our first cousin wedding!


my super duper lovely auntie.another cousin's wedding


tamu besar at Kota Belud


first research paper presentation and alhamdulillah

november 2013


the kids too scared to hold the snake so here we go


bongek tak ada padi. so this kid is too happy when she saw the paddy field


and part of my little family here in Sabah


alhamdulillah.alhamdulillah.alhamdulillah.
12 months here and I learnt a lot. dunno whether I'll be able to get the same experience elsewhere.
sebab itu kena percaya setiap ketentuan Allah tu ada hikmahnya.
kalau tanya sekarang pun masih tak percaya.
its been a year and too many things happened.

someone text me and asked, "bila nak minta balik?"
tak semudah tu nak balik. emak abah tak panggil balik. nak kata calon suami pun tak ada lagi apatah pula perancangan nak kahwin. memang belum sampai masa Allah nak hantar balik ke semenanjung duduk bawah ketiak emak abah lagi. hantar duduk jauh. belajar berdikari. belajar uruskan kewangan sendiri. belajar uruskan masalah sendiri.

friends are getting married. friends gave birth.
congratulations everyone! trying my best to attend your wedding invitations tapi kadang-kala doa sahaja dapat dikirim. it is not that easy to go back selalu. so please jangan kecil hati kalau yang kawan yang duduk 1013 batu jauhnya ni tak dapat hadir majlis bersejarah kawan-kawan lain.

2014 coming and i'm excited for next year.
can see few important pending tasks waiting but never mind i've another big agenda next year, insyAllah.
received best friends' wedding invitations almost every month next year. february,march and april.

insyAllah semoga Allah mudahkan urusan tahun kedua di Sabah.
insyAllah semoga Allah murahkan rezeki tahun kedua di Sabah.


Happy Anniversary, sayang!



with love,
betty











 
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