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mati


semalam saya menangis lagi.walaupun hanya berchatting dengan jaja meluahkan rasa takut mengenai mati.saya takut hendak tidur bimbang tak berpeluang melihat dunia lagi hari ini.tapi setelah menerima nasihat jaja,akhirnya saya tidur dengan redha apa yang akan berlaku nanti.alhamdulillah umur saya masih panjang dan berpeluang melihat dunia hari ini.berpeluang menjadi pengacara majlis untuk program pemantapan wawasan hari ini.berpeluang bertemu dan berbual dengan yang hari ini.alhamdulillah.

mungkin bebanan tugas dan kepenatan dan kerinduan untuk balik ke rumah telah menganggu emosi semalam.saya betul-betul rasa dekat dengan kematian.rasanya hendak sahaja telefon semua orang minta maaf walaupun sangat mustahil untuk saya lakukan tengah malam semalam.dan benar seharusnya saya redha seandainya Allah lebih sayangkan saya.

maka sahabat,
seandainya Allah benar sayangkan saya.tolong sampaikan pada teman-teman yang lain bahawa saya minta maaf atas segala salah silap dan minta halalkan makan minum selama ini.kalau ada hutang antara kita,minta pada emak abah saya kerana mereka ada segalanya.

telah saya amanahkan dua teman lagi untuk bertemu dengan ibu bapa saya.tolong ingatkan mereka seandainya mereka lupa.mungkin saya akan emailkan semua password saya kepada salah seorang antara kamu.jika terjadi apa-apa gunakanlah password yang ada.

saya harap esok saya masih bernafas di muka bumi ini.saya mahu menyambut ramadhan yang bakal tiba minggu ini.saya punyai tanggungjawab yang belum diselesaikan lagi.saya punyai cita-cita yang belum disempurnakan lagi.semoga panjang umur dan saya akan menulis lagi.

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lol
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someone who understand
someone who will be there by their side
and i am one of them, like any other people

reality today,
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